Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Neuroses

In a rare moment of calm, as I sit enjoying a hunka chips and salsa in my pajamas, it has come to my memory that the following excerpts of e-mails have been sent to Aaron, by me, within the last two weeks:

"Oh my gosh bud, I just bought this dress online for $51.99. I was waiting for it to get back in stock and then it did and I don't know what I was thinking I just bought it! Is that ok? Don't worry. They have a good return policy."

"Babe, help me! I really want to go to Zumba tonight but I promised Vanessa I'd chat with her on the phone after work and I want to have enough time to talk to her but I don't want to go to Zumba late but I want to work out today because I feel lazy. Serioulsy, what am I going to do?"

"OMG bud I just wrote on (someone's) facebook wall and I just know (they) are going to get mad about it. Why did I do that?! Are you mad at me?"

And this one's just glorious:

"BABE:

ADLSKJSLDKFJSLDKFJSLDKJFSLDKFJLSKDJFSLDKJFSLDKF
that is my whiney voice. Please take five moments of silence and hear it in your head. Here it is again:
LKAJFLSAKDJFLSKJFDLSKDJFLSKJFLSKJFLKSDJFLSKDJLKJDSF
MY NECK IS SORE AND MY THROAT HURTS AND I WANT A RED VELVET CUPCAKE BUT I DON'T WANT THE CALORIES."

(that was the entirety of that one.)

And here's the thing, people. With all that blathering, borderline-frightening crazy up there, I get responses like this:

"Babe, I'm so glad you got that dress! I can't wait to see it on you!"

"Hi love! Why don't you just talk to Vanessa in the car on the way to Zumba. The worst case scenario is that you miss the very beginning of class, and that won't be so bad."

"I'm not angry at all, little girl! Don't you worry about it! What you wrote was great."

And, well, to that last piece of literary perfection, he replied:
"RIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. That's how I feel."

They can't all be winners.

But he certainly is. Give him a medal. And for me...maybe some ritalin?

1 comment:

  1. Maria! So good to know I'm not alone in this! :) I e-mail/tell my hubby stuff like that too! It's amazing to see how God blesses us through them, isn't it? Thanks for writing, I love following your blog! Keep up the good work!

    God bless,
    Meghan

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